Struggles with asking for help and accepting it (redacted version)

[Selene310187]

TL;TR: What can I do to combat the self-doubts that can arise when I want to seek help from others? Reasons for the struggles: On the one hand I don’t want to impose myself, on the other hand I’m afraid of the possible rejection. If this happens, I need a lot of willpower to bite the bullet.


For many years, my rule number one was achieving everything alone and sorting things out for myself. I don't know the exact reasons why I did this anymore. Maybe I didn't want to show my vulnerable side.

Realizing that I need help and finally accepting it - a situation needed to become worse enough that I took action. I waited too long when I experienced my first big crises.

But I managed to turn things around somehow. I remember making use of the pastoral care once in these dark times. Some time later I consulted my psychiatrist again who I hadn't seen for some years. When I moved to Bremen to start the second apprenticeship in 2012, I thought that I don't need his help anymore - the biggest fallacy of my life so far.

Since then I haven taken part in various programs and therapies which contributed to my mental stabilization without the need to go to a psychiatric hospital and I'm proud that I hold the part-time job for three years which not only pays my bills but also gives me a purpose. They helped me to cope with my reoccurring depressive phases, to live with them, and to improve my resilience over the years.

However, sometimes I still have struggles to ask other people for help because on the one hand I don’t want to impose myself, on the other hand I’m afraid of the possible rejection. If this happens, I need a lot of willpower to bite the bullet.

Do you have problems with asking for help and accepting it, too? What can I do to combat the self-doubts that can arise when I want to seek help from others?


Note: This is the redacted version of a deleted thread which I wrote yesterday. I've rewritten some parts of it, removed information that I found too personal in hindsight (like what crises I experienced and what programs and therapies I took part in), made the second question at the end of the text more clear and I added a TL;TR to the top of the post.